JPMorgan Chase CEO Jamie Dimon Declares War On Clarity Act, Calls Coinbase’s Armstrong ‘Full Of Sh*t’

JPMorgan Chase CEO Jamie Dimon has drawn a battle line in Washington: the Clarity Act, as written, is dead on arrival — and Coinbase CEO Brian Armstrong is the enemy driving it.

In a Fox Business interview on Friday, Dimon unloaded on the pending crypto market structure legislation, calling it a threat to the financial system and a gift to an industry that wants the privileges of banking without the responsibilities.

“It allows cryptocurrency firms to effectively pay interest on deposits — stablecoins or something like that — without the protection that they should have,” Dimon said. “It has almost no legal protections.”

His core argument: if a crypto platform…

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Jamie Dimon Blasts Brian Armstrong Over CLARITY Act: ‘You Are Full Of…’ – JPMorgan Chase (NYSE:JPM)

Banks Won’t Accept Stablecoin Yield Without Regulatory Safeguards

Dimon’s core objection is stablecoin yield.

The CLARITY Act would allow crypto firms to reward customers for holding stablecoins, something banks argue creates direct competition without requiring the same consumer protections banks must follow. 

He also flagged the bill’s Anti-Money Laundering and Bank Secrecy Act provisions as inadequate.

“It allows cryptocurrency firms to effectively pay interest on deposits, stablecoins or something like that, without the protection that they should have,” Dimon said. “The banks will not accept it that way,” he added.

Despite the opposition, Dimon said he supports blockchain…

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Bitcoin Reclaims $74,000 While Ethereum, XRP, Dogecoin Go Sideways Amid Iran Peace Hopes

Bitcoin traded around $74,000 on Friday as improving regulatory sentiment helped stabilize crypto markets.

The move comes after the Commodity Futures Trading Commission opened the door for crypto perpetual futures trading in U.S.

Notable Statistics:

Coinglass data shows 96,876 traders were liquidated in the past 24 hours for $266.92 million.       

SoSoValue data shows net outflows of $228.9 million from spot Bitcoin ETFs on Thursday. Spot Ethereum ETFs saw net outflows of $121.4 million.

In the past 24 hours, top gainers include Injective, Hyperliquid and Artificial Superintelligence Alliance.

Notable Developments:

Trader Notes:

Ted Pillows said Bitcoin currently faces two…

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LATEST: CFTC Chairman Mike Selig Announces Approval of Bitcoin Perpetual Contract on Registered Exchange

The U.S. Commodity Futures Trading Commission (CFTC) has approved the listing of a Bitcoin perpetual contract on a CFTC-registered exchange. This marks the first regulated “perp” product available domestically, with KalshiEX’s BTCPERP contract referencing Bitcoin’s spot price without expiration.

CFTC Chairman Michael Selig described the move as historic, aiming to bring a major segment of crypto derivatives trading into the U.S. regulatory framework. Perpetual contracts, which dominate global crypto volume, were previously mostly offshore. The approval includes safeguards for market integrity and risk management.

This development follows earlier signals from Selig about onshoring perpetual derivatives to support innovation while maintaining oversight. It aligns with broader efforts to position the U.S. as a leader in crypto markets.

XRP Is Down 60% While Bitwise Says Another Token Is Crypto’s Most Mispriced Asset

XRP Had Every Catalyst And Still Went Nowhere

Goldman Sachs built a $154 million XRP ETF position and quietly dumped the entire stake by Q1 2026. Six straight months of red followed from October 2025 to March 2026, with XRP still trading around $1.37 to $1.45.

Meanwhile, institutional money chased AI stocks and semiconductor names while crypto sat in a holding pattern. 

Bitwise Head of Research Ryan Rasmussen described the current environment as “a stage of apathy,” with investors deserting ecosystems they have held for nearly a decade.

Bitwise Says HYPE Is Only 5% Through Its Re-Rating

Meanwhile, Hougan argued on the Milk Road Show that the world is only about 5% done realizing what…

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Retired Couple Loses $76,000 Life Savings To Bitcoin ATM Scam, Sues Bitcoin Depot In Federal Court

A class action filed in Idaho accuses the now-bankrupt crypto ATM operator of profiting from fraud while leaving vulnerable consumers unprotected.

A retired Idaho couple has filed a federal class action lawsuit against Bitcoin Depot Inc., alleging the company’s ATM network served as a pipeline for scammers who drained their entire retirement savings — $76,000 — over five consecutive days in August 2025.

Karen and Robert Lacey, named plaintiffs in Lacey et al. v. Bitcoin Depot Inc., et al. (Case No. 1:26-cv-00288-DKG), say fraudsters posing as Norton customer service representatives and FBI agents convinced them their accounts were tied to child pornography and illegal…

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Dow Jones Tops 51,000, Dell Jumps 28% On AI Boom – Autodesk (NASDAQ:ADSK)

U.S. stocks climbed to fresh record highs by midday Friday as investors piled further into the artificial-intelligence trade following a blockbuster forecast from Dell Technologies Inc. (NYSE:DELL).

Dell surged 28% after reporting first-quarter revenue of $43.8 billion, an 88% increase from a year earlier, alongside adjusted earnings of $4.86 per share.

The company disclosed $24.4 billion in AI-related orders and dramatically raised its fiscal 2027 outlook, projecting revenue of $165 billion to $169 billion versus Wall Street expectations of roughly $144 billion.

Dell also boosted its AI server revenue target to approximately $60 billion, reinforcing optimism around the broader AI…

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CFTC Cracks Open U.S. Market For Bitcoin And Crypto Perpetual Futures

The U.S. Commodity Futures Trading Commission (CFTC) has cleared the way for American traders to access one of crypto’s most important derivatives markets, approving the first true bitcoin perpetual futures contract on a U.S. exchange and issuing parallel relief that lets Coinbase route U.S. clients into global perp and options liquidity.

On Friday, the agency approved KalshiEX, LLC’s BTCPERP contract, a perpetual futures product that references the spot price of bitcoin and trades on Kalshi’s CFTC‑regulated designated contract market. 

At the same time, staff granted no‑action relief to Coinbase Financial Markets, allowing it to offer digital commodity derivatives…

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SpaceX IPO Frenzy Arrives In Crypto—And One Exchange Is Reaping The Benefits

A growing corner of the crypto market is already betting on SpaceX’s potential IPO, with traders piling into perpetual futures tied to the company’s expected public debut.

How Traders Are Betting On SpaceX Before IPO

The synthetic contracts, launched earlier this month, are averaging nearly $18 million in daily trading volume over the past two weeks as speculation around what could become the largest IPO in history accelerates, Bloomberg reported on Friday.

Unlike traditional equities, these perpetual futures do not give holders legal ownership of SpaceX shares.

Instead, traders use them to speculate on where the company could price once it eventually goes public.

Whether the pricing proves…

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Bitcoin ETFs Starting To Look More Like Gold Than Tech? Wall Street May Love It – SPDR Gold Shares (ARCA:

Bitcoin ETFs may finally be evolving into the asset institutional investors wanted all along — not a high-beta tech trade, but a gold-like portfolio diversifier.

IBIT’s 60-day historical volatility has fallen from peaks above 66 to nearly 34, while GLD’s volatility has climbed from around 10 to above 27 during the same period. The convergence suggests Bitcoin may be maturing from a speculative momentum trade into a more stable macro asset.

Why Wall Street May Love A Less Volatile Bitcoin

For years, critics argued Bitcoin traded more like a leveraged Nasdaq bet than a safe-haven asset. During periods of monetary tightening, Bitcoin often moved in tandem with high-growth technology stocks,…

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